Cre8pc’s 5 Predictions for 2007

Having been tagged by Andy Beal, who was tagged by Mashable, I went to my sacred corner of the house where the incense cones, pieces of shells, gems and things my kids have made for me are gathered, and whipped out my crystal ball and sweetgrass. Not to be confused with the other of kind of “grass”. The kind I use chases away bad spirits, so I can focus.

Okay, that was me, about 20 years ago. Now, I’m just sitting on the boring couch with my laptop and a Golden Retriever who keeps begging to go pee.

My top 5 predictions for 2007 are:

1. Everybody will get mad and throw their laptops out the window, screaming, “I’m mad as hell and can’t take it anymore.” And then they’ll log off Second Life and come back to reality.

2. Google will peak out at $1000 a share or create new reasons to need a) search, b) the internet, c) TV, d) ad revenue, e) blogs, f) get jobs, g) get analytics, h) reasons to look at Mars, i) reasons to look at your house on Earth, j) don’t forget the Moon, k) a shopping cart, l) research, m) find banned books, n) get the news, o) play games, p) find a mate, q) share pictures of you, r) play music, s) create documents and spreadsheets, t) make videos and embarress your friends, u) learn Shakespeare, v) sell stuff, w) train a pigeon, x) get mentalplexed y) download stuff you don’t need z) and tell them what else you want that they didn’t get to yet.

I want a pony.

3. There will be a polarization in social media where two groups will form. Look for more niche sites and huge communities where like-minded folks will socialize and do business with each other. Do you want to do business with people who send anonymous porn spam to your site, or vote your domain off or blacklist you because of the industry you work in? There will be a site for you to do that. And then some sites for the rest of us with our brains inside our heads, and not up your you-know-what.

4. Next year’s Time Person of the Year will not be “You”.

5. Every mobile phone voicemail will be preceded with an advertisement. Did I just give Google another idea?

I need a farm, to go with that pony.

My other ones:

1. Google will hire Bill Slawski just to shut him up so we don’t get to know anything anymore.

2. Danny Sullivan will start another search engine industy forums and offer Google big sums of money to get Bill back.

3. MyblogLogOrkut who?

4. “So Give Us Pause” – dated 2005-05-22 – Fantomaster, turns out to be none other than Rip Van Winkle.

5. We learn that A-list and B-list were never truly the mark of a hot woman blogger. It’s our D-cup that counts.

To continue the tradition, I tag SugarRae, Todd Malicoat, Michael Gray (and when Michael recovers from his Aussie holiday, he and Scottie’s InSearchofStuff)Â I purposely sought out courageous, humorous, outspoken folks who aren’t afraid to think outside the box. This is what 2007 will be all about.

4 thoughts on “Cre8pc’s 5 Predictions for 2007”

  1. Great predictions, Kim.

    I really did enjoy that area between San Francisco and San Jose when I visited this summer. I could live there. :)

    You keep on giving Google ideas, and they may want to hire you.

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